For weeks now, I’ve been coming home to find a caterpillar in my apartment. He’s usually on the linoleum in the entryway or on the carpet in the living room. Once he was all the way in the bedroom. Every time I find him inside, I put him outside, but eventually he gets back inside again. He’s too big to fit under the door, so I think he hides quietly by the door jam and waits, and then when I open the door, he stealthily scurries into the apartment.

I’m not sure why he wants to be inside. It’s my understanding that caterpillars need leaves or trees (or something), and I don’t have either. There’s a perfectly good tree right outside my apartment, but no, he wants to be in here with me.

He’s cute, too. He’s not icky like a bug; he’s fuzzy and you can pet him. When I pick him up to move him, he curls up and pretends to be a fuzzy, black Cheerio. He doesn’t fool me, though; he’s a caterpillar, not a Cheerio.

I would keep him as a pet (and I think that’s exactly what he wants), but I really don’t know how to care for a caterpillar properly. I think he’d be better off in the wild than in captivity.

So today, when I found him sneaking up the door jam, waiting for me to come home, I decided to put him in the tree out front. He hasn’t come back yet; hopefully he’s happy with the tree and will make it his new home. Part of me will miss him, though, so I’ll prob’ly go out to the tree and visit him every once in a while to make sure he’s okay. Perhaps he’ll come visit me too.

Everyone needs to check out the hairstyle that Concert Date Ken is sporting. One reviewer actually said, “Concert Date Ken looks real cool in his new hairdo.”

I personally think it looks like he’s wearing a fuzzy hunting cap.

Last night at Downtown Disney, there were hundreds of people standing in the courtyard outside the movie theaters, watching the final game of the World Series on a giant television screen.

Amie, Jonathan, and I just wanted to go to Rainforest Cafe to have a Volcano (if you’ve never had one, you’re really missing out), and it didn’t occur to us that there would be a huge crowd at Downtown Disney watching the game.

We went up to the elephant and told the hosts that we had a party of three. We were expecting to have to wait between forty-five minutes and two hours, just like usual. But then an amazing thing happened: They seated us immediately! There was no wait whatsoever! Apparently although there was a huge crowd outside the restaurant, there was barely anyone inside the restaurant.

Unfortunately, both Amie and Jonathan ate way too much food and ended up feeling really sick. And then when we were leaving the restaurant, the game ended, so we had to make a mad dash for the car to avoid the exiting crowds.

I needed red dye for part of the Halloween costume I’m making. So I went to Michaels yesterday to buy some. The dye I got is called “One-Step Fabric Dye,” and on the side of the box, it lists three steps.

I think we’ve all noticed that if you crumple up the paper towels as you pull them from the dispenser, you’ll need at least two of them to completely dry your hands. However, I’ve come to the conclusion (after much experimentation) that if you leave the paper towel flat while you’re drying your hands, you’ll only need one towel to finish the job.

Of course, the surface area of the towel is the same regardless of whether you crumple it or leave it flat, so this doesn’t seem logical. But it’s true, I tell you, and I believe I know the reason for this odd phenomenon.

When you crumple the paper towel, you’re forcing parts of it to become wet without even touching your hands directly, because the water will soak through one layer onto another. Therefore, more of the towel’s surface area becomes moist (and can no longer assist in the drying process). By leaving it flat, you’ll notice that it gets much wetter overall, but that you have enough dry area to finish drying your hands before the whole towel is wet.

If you didn’t already think the U.S. was psycho-paranoid about marijuana, this article from CNN should provide some enlightenment. Apparently Canada is considering lowering the penalties for possession of marijuana (not even legalizing it; just making it slightly less illegal), and the U.S. is up in arms about it.

I’m not even a user, and this still pisses me off. The U.S. is concerned that as a result of this change, marijuana will be smuggled more frequently from Canada into the U.S. Meanwhile, people from the U.S. are smuggling guns into Canada because the U.S. gun control laws are more relaxed. Which country do you think has more cause for concern?

I finally decided to give up discretion completely and mount my USB FM Radio antenna on the top of my cubicle wall, where I can actually obtain something that resembles mediocre reception. Hopefully coworkers in my office will think I’m using it to receive vital information for selling audiobooks on our web site, when in fact I’m using it to get Kevin and Bean.

When I’m at my apartment, my phone says “Cingular” instead of “AT&T Wireless.” This has been happening for about a week.

I called AT&T to complain, and they said, sure enough, one of the cell towers is down in my area, and that’s why my phone is picking up Cingular coverage instead. However, when it does that, it’s roaming. And even though I’m on the “national” plan, I don’t get free roaming.

Of course, when I see that the phone says “Cingular,” I can just choose not to place a call from it, and therefore not incur roaming charges. In fact, when I’m at home (which is the only place I have this problem), I generally place calls from my home phone anyway.

Unfortunately, when I receive a call, the caller ID box fills the entire screen, and I can’t see which network the phone is using. So if I answer a wireless call while I’m at home, I might or might not be roaming, and if I’m roaming, I’ll be charged for it.

I asked AT&T if I can receive credit for any roaming charges incurred on incoming calls I receive while I’m at home, but they said that wasn’t possible. They will charge me for roaming regardless of whether the phone indicates that I’m roaming, and I cannot contest the charges. As an added bonus, they have no idea when my local cell tower will be operational again.

So if you’re calling me, please try my home phone first.

I went to Target to get a gift card for my friend Valerie, who’s celebrating her twenty-eighth birthday tonight. I paid for the gift card with my credit card, and along with my credit card receipt, the clerk also handed me a gift receipt.

You know, in case she decides to return the gift card and get something else instead.

There’s an entire category on Yahoo! for animations based on misheard lyrics, and boy does that make me happy when I’m bored. My absolute favorite in this category is “Let the Bodies Hit the Flo!”, misheard and animated by Kimbo.